Go me!: Measuring Success

How do we measure success in our battle with the bulge? Many of us place so much importance on THAT scale. It looms in our bathroom, staring us down as we step out of the shower each morning. We see its spiteful glare sneaking up behind us as we brush our teeth in the mirror. The doom and gloom music underwrites the scene as we inch closer to it. Our feet step gently, as if we are somehow tricking it into measuring a smaller amount than we actually are. Our eyes are clamped shut as the numbers spin. We inhale loudly and look down. The numbers spell out “failure” or “success.”




Is this really a fair way to measure the distance we have traveled on this journey? Should the pounds be our road marks? I would argue, “No.” This, of course, took me a long time to embrace. Each time I tried to lose weight I measured my success by the scale. If I lost no weight, I failed. If I gained, I failed. If I lost only a pound, I failed. My skewed perception of success was causing me to overlook the small victories and, therefore, ultimately fail. Like so many I would simply give up saying, “I can’t do it. I’ll never be thin.”



There were multiple issues with my rationale of success. First, I needed to reframe why I was on this journey. If it was only about losing pounds and not improving my health, it would take a long time to reach any level of satisfaction in my journey. I would become discouraged and frustrated; in fact that was my pattern from previous attempts. Rather than focusing on losing weight as my goal I made it a symptom of my ultimate goal; being healthy. By focusing on the larger goal at hand I could measure my success differently allowing for the process to encourage rather than frustrate.



With my new goal of being healthy, not losing weight, I was able to map my journey by different landmarks. I was able to celebrate the small victories; each a new adventure on this journey. This morning I was engaging in a cardio and strength/resistance training workout. I completed the entire 45 minutes without stopping. I was able to do five regular badass military style push-ups before dropping to my knees, reverting back to the old school beginner style. Sweat pouring down I couldn’t help, but give myself a big pat on the back (in fact if I could gave myself a high-five I so would have)! I was a rock star this morning and owned it!



By reframing how I look at success I am encouraging my journey. The stops on the road allow me to have a more rich experience. I am adventurer! Here are some of the landmarks that I have celebrated in the last eleven months of my journey:



1. Getting into Warrior Three (Google it and you’ll be totally impressed) position for a total of ten seconds before falling out during a Yoga routine.



2. Buying clothes at the Gap, Old Navy, NY and Company, and other non-Plus Size chains. For a girl that only had the options of Plus Size Stores like Lane Bryant it’s fun to be able to buy jeans in any store a the mall. Well, almost any store. There are still those that are a little too tight to fit around these baby making hips (everyone tells me I have great birthing hips, which makes me feel like a piece of livestock. I suppose that’s why I channel my bovine brothers so much).



3. Running for ten straight minutes on the treadmill without stopping! I did this in Dallas at a fitness center in the hotel I was in for a conference. I was in such a giddy mood that I screamed “I rock!” causing my sweaty fitness center comrades to gaze at the crazy woman doing a happy dance as she bounced off the treadmill (I need to remember to contain my excitement in public).



4. Learning to cook a healthy homemade baked macaroni and cheese for my boyfriend on Valentine’s Day. It was delicious and taught me that I can make even the most comforting of unhealthy goodness into a mouth-watering healthy helping of yumminess.



5. Having a friend from high school walk up to me during my high school reunion in June and say, “Everyone else got fat and you got smaller! Way to go!” It was a crude drunken compliment, but nonetheless a tiny victory for the girl that was called “bus with windows” in high school.



6. Walking up to the 5th floor from my first floor office without breaking a sweat or gasping for air.



7. Smiling as I look in the mirror each morning, knowing I am doing something for myself. As a social work I spend my days working for others. Much of my life has been about others. I think as women we are raised to be caregivers, it’s how we’re socialized. I celebrate this truly selfish and wonderful thing I am doing strictly for myself. This is all about me and nobody else. Spending each day doing something truly pampering that will allow me to live a long enriched life is a victory that should not be ignored.



Celebrate those tiny victories. Reframe how you measure success. Don’t be a slave to the scale. Make it a part of the process, but not he sole judge. It’s Simon, but make sure you through in a little of Randy, Cara, Paula, and Ellen (whoever is judging that show these days)! Most of all make sure to find one victory each day. The seemingly mundane can guide your journey for a long time. Today I did five regular badass military style push-ups. Go me!

Yay Me:  being my OWN cheerleader.