It feels like all of my friends from high school and college are getting married and having babies. Wait, it doesn’t feel like that AT all; because it is what’s happening! What does this have to do with my weight loss journey, you ask? EVERYTHING!
This weight loss journey is not separate from the rest of my life. It’s deeply woven carefully becoming threads holding the fabric of my life’s journey together. My life’s journey is a quilt of many colors and weight loss is one of those colors. Weight loss is not a separate life. It does close me off to the rest of the world. It doesn’t stop time from marching on. It doesn’t stop me from still living my life.
That was a fact that hit me as I sweated off 10 miles on the bike at the gym today. This is a part of my life. It’s not my life. It’s not separate. It’s a part. So, often when we go on “diets” or start “exercising” we visualize a new life. We cut ourselves off from our old. Can’t go out for chicken wings during Monday Night Football. Can’t do happy hour! Can’t….can’t…can’t…etc. We seal ourselves off. Often we go as far as to diet in secret as if eating healthier and trying to get fit was a shameful practice like being a Cubs Fan (sorry Meghan and Mike).
When I think of failed diet after diet it was when I lived separate lives. I was two Melissa’s. I wasn’t one Melissa rich with shades of color and texture. I am not the Melissa I am today able to blend all things together into one tapestry of life.
What does this have to do with babies, you say? Why did I gasp at the notion that everyone is having babies and/or getting married? No, it’s not that I am 30 and suddenly this mythical clock announced it was time for me to marry and birth offspring. It’s the idea that so often people say, “you’re life is over,” when you marry and/or have babies. People talk about their “old” lives. Now, I realize this is NOT all married and/or parenting folk, but roll with it for the sake of this post. They talk about a time before. They are living lives of separation.
Do they lose themselves once married and/or having children? I would argue that this sometimes happens as does not losing ourselves at all. We take on these new legs of our life’s journey thinking that we are closing the door on the past. We can’t unwalk our steps. Good or bad they are a part of who we are and are becoming. Legs of our life’s journey are not exclusive. We can walk many paths, take my routes, and enjoy many sites along this rode.
It’s all our life. I realize that. So, I smile as I see my friends marrying and having babies. They are adding more brilliant color and texture to their life’s quilt. As am I with each new piece of silk I pick up along the way.
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